November 8, 2007
Update from the Rumor Queen
One of the few adoption blogs that SiowFong regularly reads is one that is written by a mother who has adopted two daughters from China and whose pseudonym is the Rumor Queen. Many parents who are adopting from China also follow her blog because of its reliable and up to date information.
After reading the Rumor Queen’s thoughts today, SiowFong emailed Rumor Queen’s blog entry to me, which is as follows:
“As has been reported in the forum, a respected agency has done some research, and sent a letter to their clients with some answers. The agency is clear to say that what they are saying is what they believe is true. I’m going to do this in bullet points, with my thoughts in italics.
Abandonment is down. Farmers and low income city residents who have one female child get nationwide medical and retirement insurance. This is part of a drive to try to balance the female population. (I agree with this statement, there are lots of incentives for people to keep their girls. I’m not sure abandonment is down as much as we are being led to believe, but I do agree that abandonments are happening in some areas less than they did in the past.)
Some orphanages still have many children. The agency reporting seems to think that in some cases this is because the orphanage directors saw other orphanage directors face severe punishment in the Hunan scandal. (We’ve talked about this as well, that some directors are now afraid to send paperwork because of the way the directors were treated in the Hunan scandal. I’m told the CCAA [Chinese Center for Adoption Affaris] smoothed that over by issuing clear procedures, and assuring directors that if the procedures were followed as outlined then the directors could not be prosecuted later. But, maybe some of them weren’t convinced.)
Some orphanage directors do keep kids just to keep the orphanage open, or to keep receiving government funding. But some orphanage directors are acting in the best interest of the children in their care and are working to place all of the children that they can place. (I agree with this statement, too. Some orphanages are overflowing, some are almost empty. I’ll also say that some are widely using foster care, too.)
The Civil Affairs Ministry began requiring police reports documenting a child’s abandonment status and this has caused more work for the SWI’s and the local police departments. (We’ve talked about this as well, after the Hunan scandal some rules were changed, and one of them was that an abandoned child had to have a police report when found or they could not be adopted internationally.)
Domestic adoption is up. The average “donation” paid for a domestic adoption is close to $6,000. Plus the costs to prepare paperwork are not as expensive. (I’m not sure this is the case in all provinces, as I’m aware of an orphanage where the total costs to adopt domestically are around 2500 yuan which is around $330. Perhaps the higher fee involves those who go through the CCAA instead of going straight to the orphanage? I’m sure that $6,000 is there in some cases or the agency would not have reported it. It really bothers me that there seems to be this “competition” between domestic and IA though. If domestic adoption can handle the orphan population then there should not be IA. If domestic can not, then there should be IA. And cost should not come into play. From what I’ve been told, domestic adoption is indeed up, but not in enough numbers come close to emptying the orphanages, so IA is still needed. Both should be able to co-exist without monetary competition. )
In regards to the Olympics, the agency feels that China is of the mind to just not rock the boat about anything until the Olympics are over. Their priority is to finish the Olympics with no problems cropping up. They are not going to try to force an SWI [Social Welfare Institute] to send files now because it’s safer to do nothing and not risk drawing negative attention to the program. (While I personally think the Olympics are playing a larger role in the slowdown, I appreciate that perhaps the role is more subtle. This agency’s statement is actually better than my own thoughts, because in my version there is no reason to try to improve things once the Olympics are over. In this version there seems to be a possibility that things may improve after the Olympics.)
The agency feels that the CCAA does care about the wait, but they are not as powerful as we think they are. They are at the mercy of the provinces and orphanages right now, they get whatever is sent to them and cannot demand more. (I’m still digesting this one. What I’ve heard previously is that the CCAA has their hands tied by the higher ups telling them what they can and can’t do. This version has their hands tied by the orphanages and provinces. The end result is the same though, the CCAA is doing the best they can and they are not the bad guy.)
The CCAA was created in 1996 with a workload of 3,000 placements a year. China wanted to send less babies than South Korea and Russia. In 1997 the CCAA placed more than South Korea and there were discussions about it. China became proud that families liked their children, and the number was raised to more than 10,000. (Yes, and from what I heard someone changed their mind about the “pride” part of that back in 2005 and thus things started slowing down. )
China is the only country who places mostly abandoned children. Other countries place children with known birth parents or extended families. As China develops, their IA [International Adoption] program may evolve into a system similar to that of other countries. This will likely take a while, but there is a good chance that it will happen.(Wow. That is completely new information. And could be a very big deal.)
Families who do not mind waiting will get a referral. The wait will be four years, worst case scenario. The agency is clear that they trust these statements. (I completely believe the first part, that if you are prepared to wait you’ll eventually get a referral (assuming you are still eligible when the time comes.) I do not think that the CCAA or China plans to completely stop the program any time soon. However, I wonder how they can be sure about a worst case scenario. That being said, my own feelings have been that the worst is probably going to be somewhere around the four year mark as well. The math can (and does) take us much farther, but I just can’t bring myself to believe that it will go much over four to four and a half years. )
I think I’ve hit all of the main points. Most of it is stuff we’ve been over dozens of times before, but it is nice to have a respected agency put their two cents in.
I think that the only truly new “news” is the future possibility of China allowing children with known families to be adopted.
The four year maximum thing has come to us a few times before, so it’s not brand new, but having this particular affirmation of that does give it more weight (to me, at least).”
Saturday, November 17, 2007
Photos: Column and Hand Positions
DSC_0198rIs Lydia telling her mom that she has a full stomach after dinner?
DSC_200rWith her hands crossed, Lydia is doing exactly what her mom has asked her to do.
DSC_0223rYou may have heard the term "tree hugger". Lydia, on the other hand, seems to be a "column hugger".
Note: All these pictures were taken on July 30, 2007 in the living room of our home.
History of National Adoption Month
November 8, 2007
History of National Adoption Month
November is National Adoption Month. According to about.com, the event’s roots date back over two decades.
“In 1976, the governor of Massachusetts, Michael Dukakis, announced an Adoption Week for his state. Later that same year President Gerald Ford proclaimed that Adoption Week would be celebrated nationally. As more and more states started to participate in Adoption Week it became clear that more time was needed for holding events and in 1990 National Adoption Week became National Adoption Month.
Today National Adoption Month is celebrated during the month of November. The celebration usually includes National Adoption Day with courthouses throughout the nation participating and hundreds of adoptions being finalized simultaneously.
National Adoption Month is a time to celebrate family and to bring about awareness that there are hundreds of thousands of children in foster homes awaiting adoption. States, communities, and agencies hold events during the month to bring the need for families into public view.”
Source: http://adoption.about.com/od/adopting/a/historyofnam.htm
History of National Adoption Month
November is National Adoption Month. According to about.com, the event’s roots date back over two decades.
“In 1976, the governor of Massachusetts, Michael Dukakis, announced an Adoption Week for his state. Later that same year President Gerald Ford proclaimed that Adoption Week would be celebrated nationally. As more and more states started to participate in Adoption Week it became clear that more time was needed for holding events and in 1990 National Adoption Week became National Adoption Month.
Today National Adoption Month is celebrated during the month of November. The celebration usually includes National Adoption Day with courthouses throughout the nation participating and hundreds of adoptions being finalized simultaneously.
National Adoption Month is a time to celebrate family and to bring about awareness that there are hundreds of thousands of children in foster homes awaiting adoption. States, communities, and agencies hold events during the month to bring the need for families into public view.”
Source: http://adoption.about.com/od/adopting/a/historyofnam.htm
Photos: Lydia and Ashwin
DSC_0029Ashwin Rao is holding some dental floss in front of Lydia to show her how to use it.
DSC_0032With drama and flair, Ashwin is pushing each of his cheeks with an index finger, and his repeated actions elicit repeated smiles and laughs from Lydia.
Note: These pictures were taken on November 7, 2007 in our living room.
The Home Court Advantage
November 7, 2007
The Home Court Advantage
Often when a sports journalist or reporter analyzes a noteworthy college or professional baseball, basketball, or football game, the expert comments about the home court advantage, which results from the vocal support that the home team receives from its fans.
SiowFong and I have noticed that Lydia is affected by a similar phenomenon. When she is at home, she is comfortable with visitors here even if she meets them for the first time. For example, Ashwin Rao, one of my friends, came to our home for dinner, and for him, it was his second visit here, but within minutes of his arrival, Lydia was smiling and laughing as he played with her. On the other hand, when Lydia is away from home, she is very reserved with strangers, often averting her eyes and turning her head so as not to meet their gaze. In situations outside our home, Lydia sometimes is shy even with people with whom she is familiar. Lydia’s sense of safety, security, and self-confidence seem directly related to her surroundings.
The Home Court Advantage
Often when a sports journalist or reporter analyzes a noteworthy college or professional baseball, basketball, or football game, the expert comments about the home court advantage, which results from the vocal support that the home team receives from its fans.
SiowFong and I have noticed that Lydia is affected by a similar phenomenon. When she is at home, she is comfortable with visitors here even if she meets them for the first time. For example, Ashwin Rao, one of my friends, came to our home for dinner, and for him, it was his second visit here, but within minutes of his arrival, Lydia was smiling and laughing as he played with her. On the other hand, when Lydia is away from home, she is very reserved with strangers, often averting her eyes and turning her head so as not to meet their gaze. In situations outside our home, Lydia sometimes is shy even with people with whom she is familiar. Lydia’s sense of safety, security, and self-confidence seem directly related to her surroundings.
Photos: Samaritan Finish
DSC_0227Lydia is carrying a completed box from the living room to the upper landing area
(before dad brings all the boxes downstairs)
Photographer: SiowFong
DSC_0230Lydia is taking the last of the dozen boxes to the upper landing area.
Photographer: SiowFong
DSC_0235Lydia raises her arms at her parents' encouragement to indicate that she has finished her volunteer duties for the evening.
Note: All pictures were taken on November 4, 2007 in the living room or upper landing area of our home.
Sunday, November 11, 2007
Quiet as a Mouse
November 7, 2007
Quiet as a Mouse
At 8:20 AM, Lydia and I arrived at the Evergreen School for the school’s first day of tours by appointment only for prospective parents who are considering the school. At 8:30 AM, a parent volunteer guided us to “The Cabin”, a one-room log cabin-like house where twenty-five other parents eventually joined us. Only one other family brought their child, a Japanese infant who was about a year old. The school’s headmistress and director of admissions made some introductory remarks to begin the tour. Then the parents separated into three groups, each of which was led by a parent volunteer who conducted the tours.
Santosh Zacharias, an Indian father who works as an engineer with two sons enrolled in the school for the last three years (currently one is in second grade and the other is in fourth grade), led our group, which consisted of parents who were interested in preschool and pre-kindergarten classes. During the two-hour tour, we visited a classroom in nearly every grade level that the school offers (preschool through grade 8) as well as the music area, gym, technology center, auditorium, and fine arts center. ]
After the tours concluded around 10:30 AM, the parents reconvened in “The Cabin” for forty-five minutes to ask follow up questions that the director of admission and the parent volunteers answered. Throughout this entire experience, Lydia behaved pretty admirably. Although she exhibited a little fussiness near the end of the tour, she modeled the old-fashioned adage, “children should be seen and not heard”.
Her quiet demeanor, however, did not mean that she was passive and uninterested in her environment. In “The Cabin”, she scribbled and drew on a piece of paper with a pen. In every classroom, she gazed at the children and their surroundings, and she walked around freely in several of them. She also looked through the large glass windows that lined some of the hallways.
Quiet as a Mouse
At 8:20 AM, Lydia and I arrived at the Evergreen School for the school’s first day of tours by appointment only for prospective parents who are considering the school. At 8:30 AM, a parent volunteer guided us to “The Cabin”, a one-room log cabin-like house where twenty-five other parents eventually joined us. Only one other family brought their child, a Japanese infant who was about a year old. The school’s headmistress and director of admissions made some introductory remarks to begin the tour. Then the parents separated into three groups, each of which was led by a parent volunteer who conducted the tours.
Santosh Zacharias, an Indian father who works as an engineer with two sons enrolled in the school for the last three years (currently one is in second grade and the other is in fourth grade), led our group, which consisted of parents who were interested in preschool and pre-kindergarten classes. During the two-hour tour, we visited a classroom in nearly every grade level that the school offers (preschool through grade 8) as well as the music area, gym, technology center, auditorium, and fine arts center. ]
After the tours concluded around 10:30 AM, the parents reconvened in “The Cabin” for forty-five minutes to ask follow up questions that the director of admission and the parent volunteers answered. Throughout this entire experience, Lydia behaved pretty admirably. Although she exhibited a little fussiness near the end of the tour, she modeled the old-fashioned adage, “children should be seen and not heard”.
Her quiet demeanor, however, did not mean that she was passive and uninterested in her environment. In “The Cabin”, she scribbled and drew on a piece of paper with a pen. In every classroom, she gazed at the children and their surroundings, and she walked around freely in several of them. She also looked through the large glass windows that lined some of the hallways.
Photos: Samaritan Distributing
DSC_0194rLydia is placing a pencil sharpener inside an Operation Christmas Child gift box.
DSC_0215Lydia is preparing to drop a comb inside a shoebox.
DSC_0226Lydia is carrying the sheets of stickers to distribute into the gift shoeboxes.
Photographer: SiowFong
Note: All pictures were taken on November 4, 2007 in the upper landing area and living room of our home.
Day Care or Preschool
November 5, 2007
Day Care or Preschool
Whizz Kids, Lydia’s day care, enrolls children up to pre-kindergarten age, but once the children are old enough to attend kindergarten, they must go elsewhere. Over the last few months, SiowFong and I have occasionally talked about preschool choices (e.g. Whizz Kids or another facility) and briefly discussed both the public school and private school options for Lydia when she is eligible for elementary school.
A number of preschools also offer elementary and / or middle school experiences. From conversations with her friends and colleagues who have elementary school age children, SiowFong has learned a child has a much easier chance to be admitted to an elementary school if that child is enrolled in the associated preschool. Two days from now, Lydia and I will make our first visit to a preschool called Evergreen, so the following advice seems appropriate now.
Preschool Tips
“According to the National Association for the Education of Young Children [NAEYC], the ideal childhood environment is one that is ‘dynamic and changing but predictable and comprehensible from a child’s point of view.’ In other words, it serves up a perfect balance of stimulation and routine.
Because children benefit more from being the ones in charge of their own learning (as opposed to having the preschool teacher telling them what they should be learning and when), the best preschool classrooms are made up of clearly defined activity centers that enable children to initiate play on their own. . .
Conducting an Onsite Visit
Is the preschool environment designed to meet the needs of young children?
Ideally you’d like to see most, if not all, of the following types of learning centers represented:
Arts and crafts center
Dramatic play center
Building blocks center
Sensory play area
Music center
Math center
Science center
Active play center
Preprinting center
Puzzle center
Book center
Does the program allow for individual and group activities?
Does the program allow plenty of opportunities for free play?
Do the children seem to be happy and settled?
Does the preschool teacher relate well with the children?
What are the preschool’s basic operating policies and procedures?
Does the preschool measure up in terms of health and safety?
Is the center director willing to provide you with the names of other parents who are willing to act as references?
(Source: Ann Douglas. Choosing Childcare for Dummies. Wiley Publishing: 2004. pages 175-179.)
Day Care or Preschool
Whizz Kids, Lydia’s day care, enrolls children up to pre-kindergarten age, but once the children are old enough to attend kindergarten, they must go elsewhere. Over the last few months, SiowFong and I have occasionally talked about preschool choices (e.g. Whizz Kids or another facility) and briefly discussed both the public school and private school options for Lydia when she is eligible for elementary school.
A number of preschools also offer elementary and / or middle school experiences. From conversations with her friends and colleagues who have elementary school age children, SiowFong has learned a child has a much easier chance to be admitted to an elementary school if that child is enrolled in the associated preschool. Two days from now, Lydia and I will make our first visit to a preschool called Evergreen, so the following advice seems appropriate now.
Preschool Tips
“According to the National Association for the Education of Young Children [NAEYC], the ideal childhood environment is one that is ‘dynamic and changing but predictable and comprehensible from a child’s point of view.’ In other words, it serves up a perfect balance of stimulation and routine.
Because children benefit more from being the ones in charge of their own learning (as opposed to having the preschool teacher telling them what they should be learning and when), the best preschool classrooms are made up of clearly defined activity centers that enable children to initiate play on their own. . .
Conducting an Onsite Visit
Is the preschool environment designed to meet the needs of young children?
Ideally you’d like to see most, if not all, of the following types of learning centers represented:
Arts and crafts center
Dramatic play center
Building blocks center
Sensory play area
Music center
Math center
Science center
Active play center
Preprinting center
Puzzle center
Book center
Does the program allow for individual and group activities?
Does the program allow plenty of opportunities for free play?
Do the children seem to be happy and settled?
Does the preschool teacher relate well with the children?
What are the preschool’s basic operating policies and procedures?
Does the preschool measure up in terms of health and safety?
Is the center director willing to provide you with the names of other parents who are willing to act as references?
(Source: Ann Douglas. Choosing Childcare for Dummies. Wiley Publishing: 2004. pages 175-179.)
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